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[]Thnikkaman
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Hey, I'm Superman. I can stop a bus dead in its tracks. Wanna see?

"Bad things to say or do in your first day in prison"

I'll start, in the words of the immortal Colin Mochrie:
"Hello? There's a hole in my cell that leads to the outside. Hello?!"

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13.04.05 21:54
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[]Glenn
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"Hey, I dropped my soap..."
"I need to use the phone. It's my anniversary tonight, and my wife was supposed to bake me a fi-, I mean, a cake today."
14.04.05 01:51
Post #17
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[S]Bloopy
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"Hi, I'm the guy who got your wife pregnant while you were in here."

"Hi, I'm SargeTron."

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Quoted :: Bloopy

Quoted :: thomasp
I suppose that's one "good" thing about my degree (aero engineering), there aren't too many terms/words/etc that have "alternative" meanings.
What, like cockpits, turboshafts, thrust, nozzles, corkscrews, ram drag, payload, flaps, and wind tunnels?
14.04.05 02:04
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[]Akuryou13
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" GOOOooooooood morning campers! is everyone ready for a VERY special day today?! I know I am! who wants a nice heaping bowl of sunshine with a side of happy?"

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Claymore Mines aren't filled with yummy candy, and it's wrong to tell others that they are.
14.04.05 02:45
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[S]Bloopy
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Quoted :: Akuryou13

" GOOOooooooood morning campers! is everyone ready for a VERY special day today?! I know I am! who wants a nice heaping bowl of sunshine with a side of happy?"

Hahahaaa nice one! The most brilliant stories are always non-fiction ones, so I can tell you've been in jail before!


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Quoted :: Bloopy

Quoted :: thomasp
I suppose that's one "good" thing about my degree (aero engineering), there aren't too many terms/words/etc that have "alternative" meanings.
What, like cockpits, turboshafts, thrust, nozzles, corkscrews, ram drag, payload, flaps, and wind tunnels?
14.04.05 03:36
Post #20
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[]Akuryou13
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Quoted :: Bloopy
Hahahaaa nice one! The most brilliant stories are always non-fiction ones, so I can tell you've been in jail before!
*takes out giant mace* I hate you.

and no, I've never been in jail :P

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Claymore Mines aren't filled with yummy candy, and it's wrong to tell others that they are.
14.04.05 15:09
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[B]C1
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"Hello, I see you're new. See that huge pole over there? They inspect you for diseases by shoving that up your ass. Oh..seems it's your turn"

This one's not very good =\
14.04.05 15:19
Post #22
Last edited: 14.04.05 15:19 (C1 - 1 times) [Hide Sig (2)] [Profile] [Quote]
[S]ReadMe
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"So, anyone see the chelsea game?"

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14.04.05 15:32
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[]Thnikkaman
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"No, sir, I'm not familiar with the term 'arseface.'" :/

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14.04.05 19:29
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[]kikumbob
om nom nom nom nom
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Quoted :: Bloopy

"Hi, I'm SargeTron."
That my fave at the mo :lol:

"Oh my god, youve got a bit of dirt on your cheek. Here, let me rub it off for you."
14.04.05 20:06
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[]The Pope
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"996...997...998...999...£1000! Now to put it all into my shoe."

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15.04.05 10:52
Post #26
Last edited: 15.04.05 10:52 (The Pope - 2 times) [Hide Sig (14)] [Profile] [Quote]
[]Akuryou13
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Quoted :: The Pope

"996...997...998...999...£1000! Now to put it all into my shoe."
"Hi, I'm new here.....has anyone seen my foot?"

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Claymore Mines aren't filled with yummy candy, and it's wrong to tell others that they are.
15.04.05 17:06
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[]kikumbob
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*Escorted into prison by an officer. Officer closes prison door*
"Hey! thats a neat tunnel you got going there! Let me help. Officer, do you have some kind of spoon on you..or a spade will do..."
15.04.05 19:30
Post #28
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[]RunT
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"Hey officer! Get me out of here and I'll make it worth your while" ;)

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15.04.05 20:11
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[S]ReadMe
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ok these are getting dumb now

Things you would say to the taxi driver

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15.04.05 22:59
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